Monday, November 27, 2017

HOW TO DEAL WITH DISAPPOINTMENT

Making It Series Post


Whenever you are trying to make changes in your life, it seems like disappointment is guaranteed to come along for the ride - like the annoying passenger who keeps making you stop for bathroom breaks every 30 minutes.  For the past 2 years, I have tried to get a job in the entertainment industry.  It's all a part of my larger plan to one day write for film and television.  The problem is, since I don't have prior experience working in entertainment, I am told I am not "qualified" for any entertainment job.  And I mean any job - walking dogs, getting coffee, answering phones - doesn't matter, "We like you, but you're just not qualified."  It's a total catch-22.  How does someone get experience if no one will hire them?

But then last month I had not one but TWO interviews!  Both amazing opportunities for companies I would have loved to work for.  It really felt like the stars had aligned and I was finally, finally, finally going to get my shot.  Unfortunately, they both ended with the awful and vague, "You're not right for this position," response.  

So how did I handle it?  I cried.  A LOT.  Like one of those ugly cries where your face is red and puffy for the rest of the day.  After a solid week of producing more water than LA has seen in years, I started to pick myself back up.  Now, I don't want to make it sound like after a week everything was rainbows and bunnies, but these are a few things that did that helped me feel better.

1. Listen to You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero.  I've mentioned this book before, but it is worth mentioning again.  Hearing Jen read her book aloud is always encouraging and uplifting.  Even if you feel down about everything, this book will motivate you to keep going.

2. Practice self-care.  After getting rejected from a job, or experiencing some other kind of disappointment, it is easy to put yourself down.  That's why practicing self-care is extremely necessary during this time.  I made sure I did at least one small thing for myself each day - made time to read a book, took a bath, treated myself to coffee, etc. 

3. Be your own best friend.  After the interviews, I went over and over in my head all of the things that I might have done wrong.  Although thinking of ways to improve can be very helpful, making up reasons why someone maybe didn't like you is not.  So reminding myself to be my own best friend was important.  If I had a thought that I would NEVER say to a friend, then I would dismiss it and replace it with something positive.



4. Take a break.  I decided to take a break from applying to jobs until I'm ready to put myself back out there.  If I took another interview right now, I'm pretty sure I would come off as bitter and anticipating rejection.  Ever notice how similar job interviews are to first dates?  When the time is right, I will start sending out my resume again.

5. Work on something new.  Although I'm taking a break from applying to jobs, I am still working on other ways to turn my dream of becoming a professional writer into a reality.  I turned my attention to applying to USC grad school for the Peter Stark Producing Program.  However, I wasn't able to immediately focus on this after getting rejected, because remember... I was busy crying.  But once I was able to focus, I wrote my essays, sent in my transcripts, and submitted my application!  Doing this took my mind off of my disappointment, and made me feel like I had control over my future again.  BAM!  Empowerment. 



6. Laugh.  Laughter is the best antidote to tears.  Put on a TV show or movie that is guaranteed to make you crack up!  The day I heard back from the second job interview, I took my sad butt down to the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater and performed with my improv team.  Even though I didn't feel funny at the time, watching other people perform made me happy.  

7. Be around friends.  Seeing my friends after getting the bad news made me feel supported and loved.  I was also able to catch up with them on what they've been up to, which took my mind off of myself.  My boyfriend was also my rock through all of this.  His shirts soaked up the majority of my tears that week.  I should probably buy him a new shirt.  But being around my friends and boyfriend definitely helped ease the pain of the rejection.   

8. Have faith.  No matter what you believe in, it helps to have faith that your future will bring you something that is right for you.  I have no clue what my future has in store for me, but I'm going to work my butt off.  That way, when the time comes, I will be prepared to take on whatever great things the universe brings me.

We all face disappointment, but the important thing is not the failure or the rejection, it is what you decide to do next.  Just because your Disappointment Passenger will sometimes set you back with all of his unnecessary pit stops, if you keep driving, you will eventually reach your destination.  

How have you dealt with disappointment in the past?  Leave me any tips or tricks you may have in the comments below!

x






3 comments:

  1. Oh no, I have been rejected from many MANY job opportunities. It happens to everyone, even those who try their hardest! But I'm sure the right opportunity will present itself soon. And my favorite thing to do is just laugh! Find something funny online or hang out with friends and forget about all the worries in the world! :) Thanks for the other tips!

    Kim
    simplylovebirds.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Kim! I totally agree - laughing is the best. And thanks for the support! Hopefully I'll be able to follow up this post with an "I GOT A NEW JOB!" post soon. :)

      xo

      Bobbi

      Delete
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